Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Getting what i wanted... kind of

So, a year ago, i saw some red flags in my son, obsessively pursued the nauseatingly abundant resources on the subjects of childhood disorders, disabilities, and syndromes, and have exhausted myself and others with my relentless determination to NAME the THING that is WRONG with MY CHILD. Are you hearing me?? I wanted that darned thing CALLED OUT. Out in the open. Titled. Exposed. After all, i reasoned, i can't fight something if i don't know what i'm up against. Right?

Well, finally, after months of researching, labeling, contemplating, re-labeling, and trying things from various angles, i got that coveted appointment with the pediatric neurologist. I marched in there, armed with all the things that were amiss in my child, determined that i be taken seriously. And i was. He was inquisitive, patient, and painstakingly thorough. My son walked, ran, trotted, bent, twisted, and counted for the good doctor. He closed his eyes and operated his arms and hands. He tolerated the doctor's touches and prods. He answered the questions honestly and openly.

At the end of the evaluation (a full 45 minutes, folks!), the doctor says my son has low serotonin levels causing mild OCD. Come again? OCD? That was NOT one of the things i 'diagnosed' my child with over these past 11 months! Well, apparently, God will give you what you asked for... just not exactly how you think you'll get it. I thought i'd get a diagnosis that would send us to therapy. I didn't. I thought the answer would 'make it all make sense' right away. It didn't. I thought naming the problem would be the Ah-Ha! moment i wanted it to be. It wasn't.

But in my further research (yes, the doctor indicated there was little to be done beyond medication, so i am reading, reading, reading!{Read: obsessing}), i have learned that this diagnosis does make sense. It is the answer i am looking for. And it is supplying that Ah-Ha! moment i was looking for. I can tell you this much: OCD in children is very different than what you (or i) always thought. And now that i know, i am doing things a bit differently. And my son is already showing signs of thriving!! Yay! Go, God!!

I wanted an answer.
I wanted some direction.
I wanted some tools.
They aren't proving to be that easy, but i am getting there - with the help of God, the Creator of my precious child, we will persevere. And we will have a success story on the other side of this mountain!

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