Minivan Moments

I recently listened to a radio broadcast with an author speaking about raising boys. She spoke of so many issues our boys face, but she specifically directed her book and her research to the mothers of boys. I was riveted! It was such an amazing hour of information, i bought the book before i even got to listen to the second segment. ( you can listen to it here and link to Part 2 ) One of the things that really struck me is when she was explaining what researchers have discovered about boys and video games. Boys' brains are apparently hard-wired to enjoy task-oriented activities as well as the satisfaction of completing a goal or honing a skill. Within the video game framework, you have all of the above and the boy never has to get off the couch! His brain's needs to "hunt it, kill it, drag it home, and get better at it tomorrow" are all fulfilled with some flicks of his thumbs. Generally speaking, maybe this isn't a problem, but apparently, researchers are ...

As partial vegetarians who eat limited dairy products, i strive to stay creative with our meals. When autumn first arrived, the weekly-pot-of-soup began. We call it Soup Saturday. (We also have Spaghetti Sunday. But i digress.) Every Saturday, i put on a big pot of soup. Easy enough, right? Only.... Challenge #1: it has to be vegetarian. Challenge #2: it cannot contain dairy. Challenge #3: 3 out of 5 of us don't really like a lot of vegetables. Challenge #4: i have to change it up; it must not be the same soup week after week. Challenge #5: there has to be enough of it to feed us on Saturday AND for one meal during the week. So, after at least 4 weeks of doing a new creation in soup every weekend, i am back to our first favorite soup today. Ahh... the smells of onion and garlic fill the whole house this morning! I am so looking forward to digging in!

For some reason, our culture has become very competitive in a lot of areas of life that make no sense: my landscaping is better than yours, my SUV is newer, my kids are involved in more activities, and i'm a perfect wife, etc. But the area of competitiveness in adults that boggles my mind the most is in the arena of parenting. Parenthood is absolutely the most demanding job on the planet, and if you do this full-time, all the time, without daily all-by-yourself breaks and a 2-week vacation every year, you deserve (but will likely never get) a medal of honor. And rather than acknowledge that good parenting doesn't always come easily or naturally, we put on a mask for others as if to say: oh, this is fun and rewarding and i never feel overwhelmed! If you can TRULY say that - like, in the shower, all by yourself, between you and God - then go grab yourself a badge ( or a straight-jacket, 'cuz you're delusional! LOL) and come back tomorrow. You don't need to read a...

Okay, with lots of disappointments come lots of swirling thoughts. My morning devotion is about taking hold of the good thoughts and throwing out the bad ones so that i cannot be taken hostage by negativity. Aptly timed, in my opinion! So i was thinking: what if i ran for the office of President of the United States of America? Hmm.... First, i've never cared for politics in general, though i see them as a nearly-necessary evil. Second, i've never considered that i would be any better as a politician than anyone else. However, i now understand something: if the people who believe politicking is a problem in our country continue to sit on the sidelines, we will continue to get political figures who love to play the political system. Is that how we get better? I think not. So, my platform would be as follows: - you can have your abortion, but don't ask for help paying for it. There is a simple solution to an unwanted pregnancy: don't have sex if you can't aff...

Over the past few months, i have been working with my son on the concept of calories, specifically, calories and weight management. He has finally figured out that calories must be "burned" by the body or they will be "held onto" by the body as fat. He has also grasped the idea that it takes a lot more work to burn the calories than a person might initially think, going into weight management for the first time. Now, we are working on portion sizes. This concept was tougher. The cereal box says 120 calories per serving, but it can be tough to estimate how much a serving is, not to mention that every food we consume has a different portion size. So my friend gave us some Weight Watchers serving utensils and we were excited to try them! The next day, we served up what we discussed would be a good, healthful, balanced meal for lunch. My son helped me decide what that would be (mostly they were all his suggestions, believe it or not!) and we set to work getting it o...

I haven't always lived in Tennessee. But i haven't traveled much off the East Coast, either, so i have generally enjoyed autumn more than any other season (with the exception of when i lived in Orlando - not much to love about autumn there). Here in Tennessee, however, autumn hues take on a whole new dimension, and it is autumn that most securely binds me to this land. I would consider leaving Tennessee to be closer to family. I could be convinced to leave Tennessee for some mission God might call me to. I might lean toward leaving Tennessee for better opportunities for my husband or family. Then again, when i consider autumn in Tennessee... maybe not. I. Love. Autumn. And here, autumn is richer, brighter, friendlier, and more awe-inspiring than any place i have been. It is here, in Tennessee, that i enjoy the gift of sight every year as God paints the land with all of my favorite colors: taupes and tans, festive oranges, deep yellows, rich dirty-shaded greens, earthy ...

This is the month i celebrate my own birth. I have no problems celebrating the birth of my children, because i am genuinely thrilled they have been born into my heart and my life. But my birthday always gives me pause. What's so great about me? the enemy inside whispers. This year, i may have an answer to that question, and it also gives me pause. Every life, no matter how fleeting, is like a pebble thrown into a pond: it causes far-reaching ripples the pebble will never see. My life has affected countless others, not all for the good, i'm certain, but there it is. This month, i have been thrown into a family situation that i would rather not have to deal with. But it is my life, my past experiences, my journey up to this point, that has prepared me for exactly this challenge. I do not shirk it, but i courageously shoulder that challenge on behalf of my Lord, Jesus, who goes before me in the interests of all involved. And i am reminded by a dear friend that my old chur...

So, our family recently got to try a new educational book by The Critical Thinking Co ., one of our all-time favorite publishers of workbooks! We were super excited and waited impatiently for the postman to deliver the goods. The first book we received was Crypto Mind Benders , which is a bunch of puzzles to help a child develop and use mathematical reasoning and critical thinking skills. We especially like these types of books because the children do not realize they are learning anything or even doing any sort of school - they are puzzles! We received the Classic Jokes version of the Crypto Mind Benders books, but there is also a Famous Quotations book. The books are suited for children from third grade and up, so my third-grade son and my sixth-grade daughter both got to use this book. Mostly, they worked together on it, but the sixth-grader definitely needed to do some on her own a few times - just to have the honor of completing a joke/puzzle all by her self! The jokes ar...

Please read this. If there is any doubt in your mind that our parental rights are being eroded, just read what one family just experienced in Pennsylvania. http://www.hslda.org/hs/state/pa/201203270.asp It is well worth your time. And your children's future.

Northerners, you may want to go grab a cup of coffee, start on that Leaning Tower of Laundry, or tickle some tiny toes. This one may get lost a bit on you. :) ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ One thing i have been ruminating on lately is the prevalence of masks among us. We seem to have no problems, here in The South, with putting on a multitude of masks in various situations. At church, there's the "It's-so-good-to-see-you-How's-your-family-You-take-care-now!" mask in the Sunday School hallway. At the grocery store, it's the "How-are-you-today-Did-you-weather-those-storms-okay-Say-hello-to-your-mom-for-me" mask at the checkout. At the park, you can witness the "Oh-isn't-she-precious-Where-did-you-say-she-goes-to-preschool-Oh-my-son-loved-it-there!" mask by the swings. And, ladies, all these "Treat-ya-great-to-your-face" masks just fly right off your faces when you buckle in behind the wheel of your tank, er , vehicle. You get up in...

For you mamas out there, do you remember when your baby had the hiccups while in the womb? My first pregnancy, no one told me what those jerky sensations were, but when i realized it with baby #2, it was so precious... and pitiful. I'm not a big fan of hiccups, but i'm a bit of a controlling person, so having something going amok in my body is not my idea of a good time. Not to mention, hiccups occasionally hurt quite a bit, don't they? And we all know there are methods to their extinction that are more Old Wives Tales than actual help, eh? Hold your breath, stand on your head and drink a glass of water upside down, etc. Well, i've noticed recently that many of life's turns are often like that - which explains why they have been referred to as hiccups. They are little interruptions, outside of our control, that cause a bit of discomfort, if not downright pain (depends on the depth of the spasm, doesn't it?). I realize God is wanting to keep our focus on Him....

Lately, i get the feeling that Mondays have shifted for me. I no longer feel "oh, no, it's Monday... another week. Ugh!" I suppose that is because for the past few years, i have had the privelege of being home with my children and enjoying our learning lifestyle together. Now, Mondays represent the new-again beginning of some structure, scheduled chores, and opportunities to stretch their little brains... and it happens every week! So, today's Mission: Monday (as i have come to think of it each week) is to work with flash cards every day and to get the upstairs tidy. Mission: Monday is the beginning of a project that will last the week, not the day for a one-day task. One thing i have learned is that one-day tasks need to be bite-sized. Those things go on my "to do tomorrow" list. Then, i have to have a larger goal to focus on so the bigger stuff gets done in bite-sized doses over a period of time. Less stress on me that way. :) Anyone else finding the...

What is hypocrisy? The hypocrites were originally the theatrical performers who played various parts in a play. They were actors. Pretenders. So, hypocrisy, then, is pretending, even lying. I was thinking the other day about that case in another state (North Carolina, i believe) where a teacher forced a child to buy school lunch because the parent had packed a lunch for the child that was not nutritionally sound, meaning "covering all the government's basic food groups for a sound lunch." Now, i used to work for the government, even had to know those regulations so i could decide if a child's meal 'measured up.' And i always had a problem with it because my children are unable to have dairy, but the government says they need milk at every meal. Before you jump in with "there are alternative milks," let me assure you, that is how we played the game. But where in the food pyramid is soy milk? Rice milk? Almond milk? So at what point are we just ...

I was thinking about my life the other day. About who i am. Here's what i was thinking. I am... ...a past victim of child molestation. ...a survivor of abuse. ...the adult child of alcoholic parents. ...the mother of a child with learning disabilities. ...the wife of an unfaithful husband. ...strong. ...weak. ...helpless. ...capable. ...sad. ...happy. ...angry. ...joyful. If you flip your "i am" around, with the help of Jesus Christ, you can find: M y A uthentic I dentity I AM (My Authentic Identity)... ...an adopted daughter of The King. ...a cherished child of The Savior. ...the exact parent my children need. ...the perfect match for my husband. ...the only ME i can be. I read something this month that has really stuck with me. In the book, Not a Fan (by Kyle Idleman), the author points out when Jesus is telling the people not to be like the religious leaders because "they don't practice what they preach," [ Matthew 23:3...

We began teaching a concept to our children a few months ago called "Making Amends." Basically, this is the essence of honest repentance and a healthy foundation for true forgiveness. We have taught the kids that when they hurt someone else, it is their responsibility to take the apology to The Next Level: Making Amends . Making Amends means that the perpetrator of the crime/offense has to do something for the victim of the crime/offense that is directly in line with the seriousness/nature of said crime/offense. For example, if disrespect of Mom is the offense, the child might open Mom's car door for a week to show respect. You tracking?? Now, in the end, it is up to the victim of the crime/offense to determine if the perpetrator of said crime/offense has made appropriate Amends. In other words, if Suzie pulls Katie's hair and later makes Katie's bed to Make Amends, Katie can decide if she feels the Amends-Making was sufficient to cover the offense. The respon...

Lately, i have been riding an emotional roller coaster. Situations in my life, coupled with a handful of health issues, have really wrung me out. As a parent, i remind my children at least weekly how important attitude is. In schoolwork, a positive attitude can make the work seem easier. In chores, attitude can make the job get done faster. In playtime, attitude can bring friends together - or push them away. Time to take my own advice. I need to spend the day with a positive attitude, thankful of all God has entrusted in me. I need to do my chores with a positive attitude, thankful of all God has blessed me with. I need to teach my kids with a positive attitude, thankful that God blessed me and trusted me with these special little people. I remember being a 17-year-old senior in high school, scrubbing dozens of toilets in the largest homeless shelter the Washington, DC Area has, and i was happy to be there, thankful to have some small way to help, and grateful those men had som...

We are constantly being bombarded with the Unseen in our lives: the unseen carcinogens in our air, the unseen pedophiles in our neighborhood, the unseen bugs in our mattresses, the unseen stalker on the internet, the unseen germs in the schools. There are other Unseen things you may not be aware of: the unseen abuse taking place in a home you pass every day, the unseen brokenness in the heart of someone you work with, the unseen pain of someone sitting beside you at church, the unseen financial harships experienced by a close friend or family member.... and the Unseen victims of our own thoughtlessness. This time of year, many of us take extra precautions to prevent picking up the latest 'bug' from the grocery store cart or the play equipment at the mall. I even carry hand sanitizer on my purse for ease of use in all circumstances. But i am always amazed at the level of ignorance (and i mean just that - ignorance, not knowing better) of my fellow moms when dealing with ge...