When you watch someone you love struggling with his flesh, you can be pretty sure the breakdown is coming. It is through the breakdown that people often have the breakthrough.
However, watching someone you love have a breakdown can be heart-wrenching! We women, especially, want to hold, comfort, reassure... but they don't need us. They need God. Sometimes, we get in God's way.
My mission these days is to get out of God's way and let the breakdowns happen. They might be small and many, or they might be big and few. Whatever God requires. And... i find... it begins... in childhood.
Watching my son come to terms with his own breakdown in order to let him have his breakthrough is painful. But... the goal is adulthood.... So, i have to ask myself, "is this current pain worth less pain later?" The answer is a resounding "yes!"
Madelyn Swift, author of Discipline for Life and speaker on the subject of behavior training, taught me this: "the lessons are cheaper when kids are younger." How true is that?!?! Wouldn't you rather your child learn proper care of other people's stuff with his sister's balloon poodle? Isn't it better to learn transportation safety on a tricycle (as opposed to an automobile!)? Aren't kids better off learning about lying when it is about brushing their teeth?
So, that being the case, i will continue to let my children experience the consequences of their actions, the truth of their choices, and the breakdowns that come from seeking one's own selfish desires (the flesh) rather than the will of God. Because, inevitably, they will be adults... and my job will be done... and they, my children, will deal with the consequences of how i have parented them. May God have mercy on them!